Saturday, March 29, 2003 :::
A picture of what life could have been
Never doubt that those of you at FL have amazing opportunities. Being at Columbia yesterday, that was so awesome. It reminded me of the summers I was working on my masters degree there. If I knew in HS what I know now my educational path would have taken quite a different route I am sure. My HS teachers were all too content to let the bright girl get away with doing well on tests/quizzes but turn in no homework (or very little) and just skate by. I should have done so much better. And beyond that I should have gone to a completely different undergraduate school. Pace was great and taught me a lot about life, but I was severly underchallanged by a lot of my teachers. In the process of taking a senoir level course I pled with the advisor to not make me sit in class... She would give an assignment, I would do it (not too hard) and then NO ONE else in class would get it and she would have to spend the first 2 1/2 hours of a 3 hour class going over the hw that I had done... so she agreed to meet with me for 1/2 hour before class to do the work. I actually got further than the class did.
Sometimes I realize that the choices that I made in life were the wrong ones at the time, but looking back they got me to where I am now and career wise I am pretty happy so... But I still long for some of that learning that I missed. Knowledge is the key to everything and there comes way to many times when I say I dont know. I could be happy being one of those student for life people, you know the kind always in school (thus never having to pay back any student loans :) ) and dying with every phd possible.. I mean I am learning a lot from all the work that I am doing, but its not the same as being a pure student. ::sigh::
personal rant.. those of you who ignore these can stop reading
Also, this is compounded by the pressure I am starting to get from Rich's family to have a baby. I really dont feel ready to be a mom. I mean I would be horrible.. and Rich and I are never home at the same time.. I would not be able to do what I really want to do for another graduate degree... (I really want to go somewhere on the west coast - like stamford or something) and get another masters (if not doctorate) in computer science. I would go for a couple of summers.. and if I really had to I could take a year off of FL.. At first I was looking for programs online, but realized that I need to immerse myself in whatever it is so that I have the time to devote to it that it truly deserves. A husband is self sufficient and I could leave him for a couple of months on his own... but once a child enters that picture.. ::sigh::
I dont know.. this is a source of a major internal conflict right now.. oh well ::buries self in work to keep from thinking about it::
::: posted at 9:44 AM
Friday, March 28, 2003 :::
I am in Java boredom heck
AHH!! Ok, so I thought that there would be a little boring java instruction, but still.... They broke us into three sections (beginners, intermediate and advanced) and yes I went with the advanced java users class.. but.. but.. they are teaching us.. (and I quote from a slide) "methods... begins and ends with {}".. ::sigh::
mreh.. And I am tired, and not awake.. ugh..
so I took a "bathroom break" and sat in the sun and chatted w/ eunji for about 40 minutes.. walked back into class sheepishly (baa) and totally was like.. "could not find rest room sorry" , but it was ok and timed perfectly... I walked back in just as she was finishing up her slides and making assignment (which I finished in about 10 seconds..)
Date night tonight :)
::: posted at 2:25 PM
I am in Java boredom heck
AHH!! Ok, so I thought that there would be a little boring java instruction, but still.... They broke us into three sections (beginners, intermediate and advanced) and yes I went with the advanced java users class.. but.. but.. they are teaching us.. (and I quote from a slide) "methods... begins and ends with {}".. ::sigh::
mreh.. And I am tired, and not awake.. ugh..
so I took a "bathroom break" and sat in the sun and chatted w/ eunji for about 40 minutes.. walked back into class sheepishly (baa) and totally was like.. "could not find rest room sorry" , but it was ok and timed perfectly... I walked back in just as she was finishing up her slides and making assignment (which I finished in about 10 seconds..)
Date night tonight :)
::: posted at 2:24 PM
Wednesday, March 26, 2003 :::
So much to blog, so little words..
Ok, starting off... What was up today with everyone? All the classes were like 4x as loud (except AP but there was a reason for that)...
I definatelly needed to crash today when I got home. Totally just crawled into bed and passed out for a few hours.. now I have work to catch up on meh.
ok, its about that time in the year when we all need to take a step back and refocus for the end. Yeah, I know its so close and the weather is getting so nice, but I think that we have done way too much good stuff this year to slack off to nothing now. So next quarter the Java class is going to sit down and talk about some stuff to build.
Ok, enough with the teacherish stuff.. on to random thoughts..
I so want the "make games, not war" t-shirt. (here for those who have not seen it...) I am really NOT a fan of our president - (thats the understatement of the year) and I really believe he has a personal agenda, but I also think that Saddam is creating (/has created) a situation that requires a response.. What that response is I am not sure, but ....
So in the past couple of days I have become an expert at distracting myself. I now have about 7-8 webmics (web comics) that I read daily, plus you gave me something else to play with... ::sigh:: I am going to have to lock myself in a room on sunday and just do some work on this teachers guide to the book..
OOO... so exciting apcentral posted the article I wrote about the conference in Reno.. Very cool.. ::dances:: I am pubished...
Anyway thats enough for tonight.. more to blog later..(maybe tomorrow)..
::: posted at 9:59 PM
Monday, March 24, 2003 :::
OMG there is a comic about fox lane..
well not entirely but it could be!!
and either you or you are in it!!
look here
::: posted at 7:45 PM
Sunday, March 23, 2003 :::
Seven Years
Spinning, laughing, dancing to
her favorite song
A little girl with nothing wrong
is all alone
Eyes wide open
Always hoping for the sun
And she'll sing her song to anyone
that comes along
Fragile as a leaf in autumn
Just fallin' to the ground
without a sound
Crooked little smile on her face
Tells a tale of grace
That's all her own
Spinning, laughing, dancing to her
favorite song
A little girl with nothing wrong
And she's all alone
-Norah Jones
::: posted at 5:54 PM
Thank god for the leaves!!
For all those who went to lip sync you will understand... It was so hilarious.. I think hubby is now starting to realize why you guys all crack me up so much when I talk to you.
later that night.. hubby and I went to listen to a really good band in White Plains.. forgot name though.. anyway.. onward and upward!
work work work work work !
(and for those of you who read the board - YAR!)
::: posted at 10:39 AM
